i'm like this

i just finished eating yogourt and trying to finish one of the last papers but it is hard to make words come when your fingers and your head are somewhere else.

just thinking about how saturday i wasn't alone and now i am with spring in the air and my sick plants all better and ready to bloom cause the sun comes in so bright through my windows. just thinking how this is all going to change and end and start again somewhere else or just continue in some haphazard fashion that will make sense only when i retrace my footsteps. i want this to be over to have handed in this paper and taught that class and be all evaluated but then i have no idea what will come next and if the monotony isn't in what is now but in what will come.

i'm tired and i want to sleep and not have to set my alarm but allow myself to wake up naturally when i have to pee or when mona wants to wash my face but it is not to be cause there is this paper that right now makes no sense but must by 9am.